Verbatim

Hello again, digital world! I am back on the interwebs and with a fresh perspective at that. I know this blog is less than a spec in the grand scheme of the world, but I felt I should explain, to anyone who cares, the reason(s) for my four-month hiatus. After writing my eighth month birthday post for Arthur, I realized that I was dissatisfied with my blog, but I wasn't exactly sure why. I absolutely loved sharing my little updates about Arthur's growth and development, and loved sharing all the little "mommyisms" that I was discovering day by day. It was the fact that I did not feel comfortable being 100% transparent about my personal experiences with motherhood because I knew that my general lifestyle is considered questionable by some, and easily judged by many. My biggest fear was that writing the complete truth would incur some controversy, particularly with the more traditional branches of my extended family. However, I have been doing some serious soul searchin

I love you, my beautiful boy.. always so curious, so adventurous, and so compassionate! You are an absolute joy to everyone you meet. Mama and Daddy are so proud! ▪ Ares is becoming quite the little dancer and xylophone player! I'm ecstatic to see his love of music developing so early! ❤ ▪ He watched (and paid attention to) his first Disney movie, Moana! He recognizes the songs when we play them for him now. ▪ He is standing strong and beginning to take little steps on his own! He even gains quite a bit of speed when we give him our hands for support. ▪ He is holding his own toothbrush and trying to copy us as we brush our teeth together! Also, he has been trying to feed himself now (very messily lol). I am just so impressed by his dexterity for his age. We've reached lots of milestones this month... there seem to be more and more every month as they are flying by! Now enjoy some photos from Arthur's first road trip to California for Tito Quito's b

I didn't get to write my weekend post because I woke up Saturday morning with the worst stomach sickness! :c[ If you're the workaholic kind of parent that I can sometimes be, then you understand how excruciating it can be to throw in the towel and just admit defeat to common illness. Needless to say, experiencing this amount of pain and uselessness while having to watch Ares is indeed unpleasant. One day off could mean a ton of setbacks with errands and chores, and missing out on a precious day with my quickly growing babe. Thankfully my amazing love and super dad swooped in to save the day by using one of his sick days from work. Together we were able to seemingly conquer the day... and by that I mean I slept for seven hours while he and the Ares hung out, intermittently nursing me back to health with their adorable shenanigans. I know it sucks having to take the time off from work at the same time as being away from your baby, but it is still important to take car

Once I was feeling comfortable enough to start working out again, I looked up some light cardio and simple calisthenics routines online, and slowly I began to rebuild my muscles and regain my strength. I've always felt that working out and being able to push myself to the next level offered me a therapeutic release. Any stress, worries, or frustrations can be left out on the floor, being expelled through all your hard work and sweat, along with any other negativity you might be holding onto. I think the hardest thing to keep in mind when it comes to an effective workout routine is setting realistic short- and long-term goals, as well as remaining consistently dedicated. We all know that this will not be an overnight transformation, which is something I constantly have to tell myself. Results are slow going at first, but as long as you maintain that drive and track your progress on a weekly and monthly basis, then you'll see the changes you want. Don't be af

I've heard that one of the more difficult parts of adjusting to parenthood is trying to find a balance between being a nurturing, new mother and still being a flirty, vivacious wife. I most definitely share in this sentiment! Don't get me wrong, it's not that my husband and I have lost attraction towards each other in any way. However, the healing process from a c-section birth can be long and grueling, and the process of feeling physically comfortable, let alone sexy and confident, might seem out of reach for a while. Becoming a mother is one of the most amazing blessings that a woman could receive, but the physical repercussions can be a little more than overwhelming. You find yourself wondering things like "will sex ever feel the same again," "how does my vagina plan to survive this," "is the remaining carnage I call my skin ever going to see the sun in a skimpy bikini again?" No matter your questions or concerns, I promise yo

I decided, after some heavy introspection as of late, that I can attribute a huge part of my success this past year and a half to my ability to finally take a step back and face my most detrimental problems from which I had been running for almost ten years. [At some point you just gotta ask yourself why tf are you tripping on stuff that happened in, like, '07! Come on now..] Some may not know this, but, as much as Vegas feels like home to me, I've only lived here for four and a half years, and this is, in fact, the fifth state I've lived in. One of the common denominators of all my moves and uprootedness was that I was always running from something... whether it was a bad relationship, pressure from my family to go back to college, or just generally my own past tendencies and reputation. I was so caught up with trying to fit the mold of what everyone was expecting of me that I lost sight of my own personal dreams, and stopped allowing myself to discover new things to l

My heart's been racing My stomach dropping But I'll never let it stop me Cause I got a fire right here and it's been boiling inside me So I let it grow, wait for it to overflow And explode like lightning Shoot across the night sky from the darkness behind my eyes Take a trip into my mind and you'll find it's frightening And when the glass shatters it won't matter how long you've been hiding Cause I've been biting my time and tongue Holding onto one solitary breath in my lungs Just to fill a scream Am I more than what I seem? Or just a collection of bad decisions infected by naive dreams.. I remember when this life was not only mine, but a gold mine Those are just faded memories in the back of my grown up mind now Behind resentments, and late payments, and living in my parents basement, And unopened bank statements If only I had known what the word mistake meant Instead of thinking I could live freely without ever regretting it Someone